A quest to make sense of it all. Or a sense to make a quest of it all.

Wednesday, November 03, 2010

I've lost my ability to blog in essay form. Eff perfect paragraphs.

1) I got good and pissed and sent a scathing response text to the Engineer, who is again nameless on this blog and elsewhere in my life. I told him not to pull that again, and that what happened between us wasn't special and neither is he. I'm ignoring all communication henceforth. It's time for this shit to be done. Clearly I've been on his mind, and clearly, he still hasn't figured out how to confront what's in his own head well enough to be a big boy about it. Eff him.

2) The system at work that I figured wouldn't be that big a deal has turned everyone at work into lady-raptors. I've made two mistakes, one noteworthy. But it's been corrected (and in fact had been corrected by myself before anyone else even noticed it), and once again the only people bringing it up are the people who need to shush and concentrate on their own jobs before our boss busts out a flaming sword of rightful disciplinaries. Eff them.

3) I'm no longer being coy and wishy-washy with people I care about. If it quacks like a duck, it's probably a duck. That duck may not be addressed or titled at this time, but it is what it is, and it's kinda jerkish to continue not naming the puppy. It doesn't make sense, but it feels good. Eff rationality.

4) Maybe it would be healthy to learn how to vent to the friends in my everyday life rather than keep on a happy face all the time. Eff stoicism.

5) Naaaah. Eff openness.

6) Tonight I'm taking up ___* offer to hang after work. I need to get outside my head for a minute. I've been writing, reeling about yesterday's drama (great title for an emo poem), and I'm over the blue. I think. Eff bad moods.

7) Yay for everyone who voted! Eff apathy.

8) I feel the urge to cook something complicated and impressive, and will be scouring the internet for such a recipe. Eff calorie-stressing (for today).

*This post inspired by Bill, who suggested I just say "Eff it" regarding everything. I'm giving it a whirl in lieu of slamdancing, which he also suggested.

*Name removed due to fraternization policies.

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