A quest to make sense of it all. Or a sense to make a quest of it all.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

It's like an 80's comedy.

Friday night, I believe. Luke and I were enjoying a Grey's Anatomy marathon. Somewhere around the time the She-Shephard showed up and announced herself as McDreamy's wife, my sickly terrier must have quietly thrown up right in front of the chair I was sitting in. No one noticed. When the episode ended, I jumped up to change the disc and my bare foot landed in dog vomit. I shrieked like a banshee and hopped-ran to the bathroom to wash my foot as Luke bounded off the couch to fetch paper towels. He quickly set about wiping up the mess as I turned on the bathtub faucet and switched the flow to my handheld shower head. I clumsily plopped down on the edge of the tub, and as I swung my foot over the egde, my whole body fell into the tub, pulling down the shower curtain and the curtain rod. As I flailed under a tangle of plastic and polyester and tried to catch the spinning shower head that was spraying water all over me and the bathroom, my husband came running into the bathroom to throw the paper towels (!) into the toilet and to see what the hell was going on (the banshee noises had reached a new high). He simultaneously flushed the toilet and skidded into the doorjamb, where he stubbed his toe hard enough to make him bellow like some horribly wounded forest beast. Immediately, the toilet backed up and overflowed just as I was shutting off the water and climbing over the edge of the tub and into the floor.

The mop broke during cleanup.

The next morning, our neighbor asked me if everything was ok, since they thought they had heard "a fuss".


Anonymous said...

Thank god/dess for blogs. To think that these dazzling turds of humor might be otherwise lost is reason enough to keep me in vigil at my computer.

God, that's hilarious! Kind of like Kramer in a Seinfeld episode.

Beauty and the Blog said...

This is why she is my best friend. Because only she can out-do me...though...you've never spent a night with the Storm-inator.

Anonymous said...

Let's put Secret Storm in Sarah's place with the dog puke and bathtub-diving and call it a night.

Anonymous said...

I assume you gave Pizza Hut the big finger?

How have your first couple of days been?